Whether you’re at the very beginning of your adoption journey or already knee-deep in the joyful chaos of parenting, the right books can provide wisdom, comfort, and the sense that you’re not alone. These are our top adoption books for UK prospective adopters and adoptive parents. During our own journey to adopt our daughter, Willow, these became trusted companions. I read every book I could get my hands on and if I had to pick 10, these are the ones. Some made me laugh, others made me cry, but all of them helped me grow.
Every title listed below is something we’ve personally read, loved, and would recommend to any adoptive family in the UK. A few affiliate links are included, which means I may earn a small commission (at no extra cost to you) if you choose to purchase through them. Thank you for supporting this blog and helping me continue to share our story.
Best Books for Prospective Adopters & Adoptive Parents in the UK
No Matter What by Sally Donovan
This was the first book I picked up when we began Stage 1, and I still think about it often. No Matter What is a raw, honest, and deeply human memoir that follows Sally Donovan’s experience of adopting two children from the UK care system. It covers the joys and emotional toll of therapeutic parenting in a way that’s both comforting and enlightening.
Her writing is filled with humour, heart, and grace—and for me, it was a powerful reminder that we are never alone in the messy beauty of adoption.
View DetailsTherapeutic Parenting in a Nutshell by Sarah Naish
This slim but mighty book is exactly what it promises: a clear, digestible introduction to therapeutic parenting. Sarah Naish, an adoptive parent herself, breaks down core concepts like PACE, regulation, and behaviour management in ways that are easy to understand- even when you’re sleep-deprived or emotionally drained.
I kept referring back to this during our prep training and early placement, it was like a cheat sheet for surviving the tough moments.
View DetailsWhat to Expect When You’re Adopting by Dr. Ian Palmer
If you’re just considering adoption or at the very beginning of your journey, this is an excellent first read. Dr. Palmer brings years of experience as both a psychiatrist and an adopter to this practical guide, which walks you through the entire UK adoption process- from initial research to placement and post-adoption support.
It’s thoughtful, compassionate, and especially useful before you start formal training. If you’re already in Stage 2, some of the content may feel familiar, but it’s still worth a look for its clarity and warmth.
View DetailsParenting With Connection In Mind
The A-Z of Therapeutic Parenting by Sarah Naish
Hands-down my favourite parenting book—this one lives within arm’s reach at all times. Whether your child is having a meltdown or you’re facing bedtime resistance, this guide offers instant, therapeutic solutions you can actually use.
It’s arranged alphabetically (think “Anger”, “Control”, “Lying”, etc.), making it easy to find what you need in the moment. I use it regularly for my toddler and genuinely believe every adoptive parent should own a copy.
View DetailsThe Connected Child by Dr. Karyn Purvis, Dr. David Cross & Wendy Lyons Sunshine
This book was recommended during our training and quickly became a go-to for me. It focuses on building trust and attachment in children who have experienced early trauma. The authors are pioneers in trauma-informed care and offer practical tools to help you support healing and connection.
Some of the strategies may feel Americanized (the authors are US-based), but the core concepts are incredibly relevant and useful in the UK adoption context.
The Whole-Brain Child by Dr. Dan Siegel & Dr. Tina Payne Bryson
I recommend this to every parent I know, adoptive or not. It explains your child’s developing brain and shows how to respond to emotional outbursts or behavioural issues in a calm, compassionate way. The illustrations and real-life examples make it surprisingly easy to understand.
This book helped me parent more mindfully, especially when Willow’s reactions didn’t always “make sense” at first glance.
View DetailsUnderstanding The Child’s Experience
Related by Adoption by Hedi Argent
This was so handy, I bought several copies for our close family. It’s a beautiful, gentle read that helps others understand what adoption truly means, and how bonds can grow and flourish beyond biology.
If you’re looking for a thoughtful gift to help grandparents, aunts, or friends better understand your family, this is the one.
The Blanket Bears by Samuel Langley-Swain
This was one of the first books I read with Willow. With soft, comforting illustrations and a sensitive storyline, The Blanket Bears gently introduces adoption in a way that young children can grasp and feel safe with.
It’s perfect for early life story work and a regular part of our bedtime routine.
View DetailsWe Made a Wish and You Came True by Laura Cox
This was a beautiful gift from my husband’s colleagues, and it’s become such a special keepsake. It’s both a story and a journal, with guided prompts that help adoptive parents document their journey in a meaningful way.
Whether you’re just starting out or already home with your child, this book helps capture the emotions, milestones, and memories that make your adoption story uniquely yours.
View DetailsAn Honourable Mention
The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier
Though not a light read, The Primal Wound often comes up in adoption circles for a reason. It explores the deep, early loss that adopted children may carry with them and challenges us to consider what healing looks like, especially from the child’s perspective.
It’s not UK-specific and definitely more reflective than practical, but it’s worth reading when you’re ready to sit with some of the harder truths and deeper questions around adoption.
View DetailsFinal Thoughts: Build Your Shelf, Build Your Confidence
Reading these books didn’t give me all the answers, but they helped me ask better questions, stay grounded, and feel more connected to a wider adoption community. Whether you’re looking for practical parenting strategies, emotional validation, or gentle stories to share with your child, I hope this list brings you the same comfort and clarity it brought us.
Don’t feel pressured to read them all at once. I made that mistake, I purchased around 30 books at once and overwhelmed my mind. Pick the one that speaks to you now and come back for more when you’re ready. And if you’ve read any of these (or have your own favourites), I’d love to hear from you.
Drop me a message or tag me on Instagram @AdoptingWillow– let’s keep this conversation going.
If you enjoyed this post, you might also like to read some of our recent stories and guides:
- Telling Family & Friends We’re Adopting – Their Reactions, Support and Love
- The Grief Before The Hope: Our Infertility Journey Through Diagnoses, Loss and Love
- Fatherhood Through Adoption: A Dad’s Perspective
- How Much Does Adoption Cost in the UK? The Truth From My Personal Experience
- How Long Does Adoption Take in the UK? A Step-by-Step Guide With Timelines and Expectations
Thank you for being part of this journey with us.
