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Love Beyond Biology: My UK Adoption & Parenthood Journey

"Our UK Adoption Story: Accepting Infertility, Embracing Love, Sharing Real Experiences & Helpful Resources

The Day We Met Our Daughter For The First Time

Adoption, Uncategorized · May 28, 2025

This is one I write through tears of gratitude—I can still feel it, the magnitude of meeting our daughter for the first time. The moment she peeked around the corner, carried gently by her foster carer, left us in total awe. I hope that feeling never fades. I hope I always remember what that day felt like. This post is for her, and maybe for me too, something to look back on and share with her one day, so she knows how deeply she was longed for. You can imagine them through profiles, in photos, even in video clips… but nothing prepares you for seeing your child, in real life, for the very first time. In that moment, I knew in my soul: this was my daughter. I’ve written our full adoption journey here if you would like to read.

What Came Before

“As I see this being a positive assessment, one where I’ll recommend approval by panel… would you like to begin looking at profiles?”

There she was. A tiny image on a page, a little girl with a smile I couldn’t stop staring at. I didn’t know it at the time, but that profile belonged to the child who would become my whole world—whose strength, resilience, and joy would amaze me every single day.

I must have watched her videos a hundred times. When our social worker turned to Mitchell and asked what he thought, he said quietly, “She’s adorable,” but I could see the caution in his eyes. That unspoken worry: What if this doesn’t work out? Mitchell has always been steady, thoughtful, and protective of our hearts. I, on the other hand, was already falling. Mitchell has shared his thoughts in Fatherhood through Adoption.

There were unknowns—developmental delays, health concerns, and future uncertainties. I won’t share the specifics, as that’s Willow’s story to tell in her own time. But I can say this: something about her profile shifted something in us.

She was being shown to families expected to be approved soon, and we were one of them. After our social worker left, Mitchell and I sat in silence for a while. Then, we both said it: we needed to know more.

The First Step Toward Yes

Meeting with Willow’s social workers was a turning point. They were kind, open, and honest—giving us space to ask questions and time to reflect. We didn’t rush. We talked for hours afterward. There was fear, of course. But there was also something bigger than fear: a quiet certainty.

Every path into parenthood involves unknowns. That’s not unique to adoption—it’s part of loving any child. A linking meeting was arranged. We were considered a match before approval panel. It was early. It was unexpected. But it felt exactly right. I’ve written how we prepared for adoption panel, if your curious.

The Chemistry Visit – Meeting Her At Last

Because of her health needs, we were offered a chemistry visit—a chance to meet Willow early and ensure we felt confident about her care. This was it. The day we would meet her for the first time.

We left far too early, buzzing with nervous energy. Mitchell distracted himself with small talk and music. I turned inward, overwhelmed and emotional. I remember whispering, This could be the day we meet our daughter. Neither of us dared to say what we already knew in our hearts.

We parked outside and waited, nerves on edge. Knowing she was just inside that house made every minute feel like an hour.

Knocking On The Door

Her foster carer greeted us with warmth and kindness. We were invited into the living room where we were free to ask anything we liked. The night before, we had written out 25 questions—but we barely needed them. Her foster carer was generous and open, sharing stories, details, routines, and more. It was clear Willow had been cared for in a loving, stable home. They are amazing people.

In that moment, something clicked. If we were matched, we knew we could build a respectful and supportive transition together. We felt so fortunate to have people around us who genuinely had Willow’s best interests at heart.

Suddenly, a tiny squeal echoed from upstairs. “I think that’s my cue,” her foster carer smiled.

A Moment That Changed Everything

There are rare moments in life that feel almost sacred—where time slows and the world seems to narrow into one beautiful, meaningful point. That’s how it felt as she came into view.

She turned the corner, and there she was—smiling, curious, completely unaware of how deeply she was already loved or how monumental this moment was to us. It’s hard to explain, but something washed over me. I felt grounded. Whole. Like everything had led to this.

We played gently, talked with her foster carer, and soaked in every second. Her eyes, her laugh, her energy—it all felt familiar. Like home. Right. Meant to be.

The Drive Home- A New Chapter Begins

The journey home was a quiet one. I was deep in thought, replaying every moment. A tiny worry crept in: What if Mitchell didn’t feel it the same way I did?

Then he spoke, without me asking. “She’s amazing,” he said softly. “I didn’t expect it to feel so natural.”

That was it. Our hearts were aligned. From that point on, we were all in.

Final Thoughts

That day will be etched in my heart forever. We knew the journey ahead would come with challenges—rejection, trauma, and loss were very real parts of the path we were choosing. But we were ready to face them, to hold space for her pain, to honour her identity—helping her understand and embrace her story as she grows. And to walk beside her with patience and love. We leaned on great resources, including some books from my Top 10 Adoption Books for Prospective Adopters. Our promise is to keep learning, growing, and loving fiercely—every step of the way.

If you’re beginning your own journey or simply want to learn more about adoption in the UK, there are some incredible organisations offering support, information, and guidance. Charities like Adoption UK, Coram, and Barnardo’s provide resources for prospective and current adopters, as well as support for adopted children and young people. No matter where you are on this path, you don’t have to walk it alone.

My Favourite Post Adoption Daily Life Tools

We found a few everyday tools helped us stay grounded, connected, and organised as a new adoptive family. Here are some of the ones we genuinely used and loved:

Parenting Tools:

  • Tonies Story Box – A brilliant screen-free way for little ones to relax and enjoy storytime.
  • Busy Board – Great for building fine motor skills and offering independent play, especially during transitions.
  • Family Planner – Essential for keeping on top of social worker visits, health appointments, and new routines without feeling overwhelmed.

Self-Care for Parents:

  • 100 Mindfulness Meditations by Neil Seligman – A book I’ve returned to many times on this journey for grounding and perspective.
  • Meditation Cards – Quick, calming prompts to help me stay present and regulated, especially on tougher days.
  • Clever Fox Self-Care Journal – Helped me reflect daily, set intentions, and track how I was coping.

Some of the products linked here are affiliate links, which means I might earn a small commission (at no cost to you). I only recommend things we’ve genuinely used and loved. Thank you for supporting this space.

Related Blog Posts You Might Like:

  • The Grief Before The Hope: Our Infertility Journey
  • Top 10 Adoption Books for Prospective Adopters and Adoptive Parents
  • Adoption Leave- What It’s Really Like
  • Our First Week as a Family of Three
  • Telling Family & Friends We’re Adopting – Their Reactions, Support and Love
  • Fatherhood Through UK Adoption: A Dad’s Perspective
  • How Much Does Adoption Cost in the UK? The Truth From My Personal Experience
  • How Long Does Adoption Take In The UK? A Step-by-Step Guide With Timelines and Expectations
  • Why We Chose Adoption – Love Without Limits

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Recent Posts

  • The Day We Met Our Daughter For The First Time May 28, 2025
  • Adoption Leave in the UK: What It’s Really Like (From Someone Living It) May 22, 2025
  • Adopting in the UK: A Life-Changing First Week May 5, 2025
  • Grief Before Hope: Our Infertility Journey – Diagnoses, Loss and Love April 20, 2025
  • Top UK Adoption Books for Prospective & New Adoptive Parents April 28, 2025

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📖 Sharing our adoption story
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